Big news: I had the best road trip of my life. Okay, it wasn't just the road trip that was the best, but the reason for it, the people I was with, and well, even driving down the road was fantastic. Up until now, road trips with a group of people turn me cranky, I sometimes don't mesh well with traveling in a group mentality. We started out telling each other all of our fears, and then talked the entire way to Pittsburgh. I just came back from the CCMA conference which stands for Consumer Cooperative Management Association. Very many food co-ops from all over the country get together and talk food co-op. Food co-op means a grocery store owned by its customers. That means there were representatives from communities nationwide. Each food co-op has it's own mission, each has its own way of doing things, each is owned differently. It's amazing to compare and contrast. From visioning to growing in rough economic times, we make friends and get all introspective on our own co-ops. Five of us went, three board members and three staff members, I am the lucky one who is bilingual! The destination was Pittsburgh, and the co-op that hosted us was East End Food Co-op. Pittsburgh is hoppin', first of all! The whole mission of the conference was thriving in trying times, and I learned a ton about what is happening right now, and how we need to shape our own future of our businesses. It's an opportunity (opportunities, really) and I'm excited to run around taking advantage of creative, innovative ideas that help make my co-op and community thrive.

Ate three strawberries out of my garden today, they tasted like the world made me a pie, even warmed it up for me.

Some friends always give me kisses when i see them. I like that about my life.

The time that is now,
Matt and I now have "internet connection" at home. In our home. For real.
The time that is now,
I run a downtown Kalamazoo Farmers Market, which I hope really really takes off when it comes to abundant season.
The time that is now,
we had a show in our basement last night, it had to do with songs we all knew and sang along with (a friend) and also some real good songs we'd never heard, and lots of projections on screens behind their backs.
The time that is now,
A couple of good friends of mine are coming to stay at my humble abode next week. Actually, my true love Casey who is leaving and suddenly I am starting to come to terms (tears) with that fact and I just really really want it to be a blessed week together. Movies projected in our basement, dinners extravagantly, whatever we need, we should do.
The time that is now,
Good ol' Goodie Merva & Gals are visitin' this June, we'll go to a wedding, hang out with the folks, and who knows. This is a version of a friend who left me with tears in my eyes yet has come back to me with good times and a solid solid feeling that will never ever scatter. Good friends are sometimes hard to come by, I suppose I've kissed ass to the right ones though.
The time that is now,
Let's in some "rays of sunshine", and I'll leave it at that.

Every now and then I feel pretty lonely
Or maybe I feel like being lonely
Lonely is okay when it's on the way to
Feelings that will last and that will only
Upkeep the person that I am

It's hard to constantly upgrade the person that you are.
Mostly I wish I could be completely still like water,
Overriding that I have all these feeling of
Rambunctiousness and lively spontaneousity

Then again,
What will I do if I ever do
Find that balance?


Maybe I already have it,
Maybe I don't

i've got a heaping pile of polenta, made by the amazing c. mckenzie, with cheese, veggies, and polenta. dang good.

i've got red on today, i feel charged!

many plans for the upcoming season, as long as i feel this charged, things will go well. sometimes it's hard to continue the excitment, but being that this is SO exciting, i guess i could keep it up. (i'll even tell you about it sometime)

got a new table, or rather, a table new to us, it seems to make dinnertime official.

i'm looking to relax, not sure how to. i definetly need something to let it all out. everytime i drink a beer or a glass of wine, i just fall asleep. so that doesn't work. so far, dancing with three year olds is about my only outlet. which is pretty funny.

This week I have a cold, not a snow, a little rain and I heard rumors that there was even a sun. Matt and I got a really great flu, exciting to spend our time complaining and moaning and sniffling together, ya know. Saturday is a really fun night planned of love songs, and more!

My mouth is dry.

It feels really warm out
My cat Henry would be so happy
But we had to put him to sleep Thursday
For kidney failure
Today he would be romping around
Chasing other cats and greeting me
At the back door with a friendly
Meeooow.

last night the snow came back, i dreamt of zombies trying to eat my limbs, i woke up fuzzy and when i got in the car there was a basket with two cookies inside for me. i haven't eaten them yet, but maybe on my drive home i will. or snuggled up next to my cat while watching mash. i helped write a song on mandolin, i'm bored, and i'm busy and broke. what are you doing today?

so far i'm working on a song about being a caterpillar, a dolly parton song about butterfly love,....there's room for more! takers?

walking around during these low light days is at least keeping me somewhat cheery. my opinion is that in order to really not let the winter get to you and get you down, you just have to go out there and beat it! that means wind whipping at your face, small slivers of skin where your gloves and sweater don't reach getting cold and battered, chapped lips and then there is that fun time of coming inside where it's dark after being outside where it REALLY bright and your vision is !broken!, it takes a minute to really adjust. anyway, experiencing the winter weather helps me cope, unfortunately I have to cope because it's getting to me! ohhh...enough to sigh for about 3 days straight. anyone have any other ideas for coping with this lowlightlovelyness (that's not always so lovely)?

michael pollen, talking on fresh air, NPR
really awesome, wants the white house to make a farmer in chief, grow 5 acres of their 17 acre lawn as a farm, this is so fun to listen to
apparently obama was mocked for ordering arugula instead of iceburg lettuce
woah!

Gotta say goodbye to the "baby truck". Sandy was a great friend to me, but I have to say goodbye for now.  You see, one day last week, Matt and I got a minivan (not on purpose).  Now we have too many cars, we already had too many cars.  So I guess we need to get rid of some of them.  Anyway, instead of selling the baby truck to someone who will use it to garden, etc. I spoke to Brother #2 and he wants it back. So, I have no choice. I'm sorry if anyone else really wanted it, I can't do nothin' about it.  BUT I will take you for a ride in my minivan, if you want.  We can even make out in the back after I put up the standard curtains and put down the feather mattress.

these days are taken up with moving furniture (for the first time since we moved it IN to the house, we've now moved it around), making plans for shows and parties and fun, workin' my pants back on, eating corn chowder, hearing commentaries from everyone about the life in the world of america including but not limited to: the election, the economy, and all the whatifs and opinions the rest of the country has about itself.

it feels good to keep moving, although i am not moving very fast or getting so many millions of things accomplished, i'm moving and i'm not sitting.

come to my house this saturday for a basement dance party (in honor of h. finch's birthday, too)

well, tonight i am going to stand up and talk about the future chefs program that i run and it will be in front of a lot of strangers and i am quite nervous.

glad i got that out.

it's no big deal i just had all these horrible horrible nightmares about everything going wrong that could possibly go wrong. and now i can't stop thinking about it.

thanks for listening.

i could use a nap, pretty much all the time
but i've been getting a lot of cool things done
like laundry! and other things, too




i am now accepting aprons via package in the mail, left on my doorstep, you could even leave them at work for me.

those ones up there i made.

Thought I'd alert the masses, if anyone in Kalamazoo reads this that is.

sweet cherrries from the Traverse City area
really great color, nice and not too sweet
certified organic
get them at the
peoples
food
co-op

this week right now do it!

the path that stops pouting and starts...well in this case I started embroidering. But feeling better about stuff, stuff in general and all those detailed stuff's, too. Sometimes you just gotta invest some time into your own self and stop giving all your time away to everyone else. I will be excited once August comes and my future chefs class comes to a close, it's been fun and a lot of work. speaking of a lot of work, yesterday i spent a few hours picking little bitty tomatoes in a really hot hoop house and i kind of wanted to keel over right then and there but i didn't, oh no, the tomittybitties needed me. dedication to fruits and veggies, they don't talk much and they usually smile at me.

not sure where my emotions are leading me, but i suppose it's a good thing to get in touch with your vulnerable side every now and then.

wish i could get in touch with my will-power, use my strength, be all that i can be.

casey says at my age, i don't need to have everything figured out, this is the figure it out time of our lives and assessing what to take and what to leave is what i should be doing.

see, i'm just doing what i should be, instead of shoulding what i'm doing.

now that my grandmas gone, every now and then i want to cry like an idiot

now that it's summer, i am relying hard on my planner and can't live without it and when i do (like the last 7 days) i get butterflys in my stomach at just the thought of forgetting i'm supposed to do something

now i'm eating a salad, with juicy raisins and cheddar sticks and dressin'

now i have to go back upstairs to a place where people are coming and going constantly and they always need your help and you are always glad to help them because that's your job and thats actually what you like doing best, helping. by you, i mean me.

i kinda just want to give up on everything and simultaneously be involved in everything else